Tag Archives: judgement

Political Judgement Anxiety

I made a post on Facebook today. I rarely do that. It was due to the politically enraged posts I’ve been seeing. I have enough anxiety as it is over who will win the election. I just felt the need to express myself. I actually wrote what I wanted to say about a day or two ago, then never shared it. Luckily it was still in my drafts. Of course I read it again and reworded it. Several times. Panic set in. I hesitated multiple times.

Then finally posted this…

I’m sorry for the long post but I feel the need to say this. It’s regarding the recent flood of political posts.

I see my friends and family members arguing either on their own pages or even on public news ones. Or those that say to unfriend them for this or that. I read and continue scrolling, knowing how that person feels. I don’t delete or comment. I don’t normally discuss politics anyways, but it’s to the point that I’ve been worried to even hint who I voted for. I’m afraid I will be judged and will lose some people that I truly consider friends.

That’s sad. It’s sad I’m worried about that, but it’s also sad that some of you would actually delete me just for that reason. I just know how strongly some of you feel and how savage you’ve been. I also know the friendships I’ve had with some of you that I’d hate to lose.

Honestly, I don’t unfriend for different views or ways of life. I do not judge anyone based on age, race, diet preference, religion, gender, music choice, sexual preference, profession, friend affiliation, political party, or what color narwhal you choose to be for the day.

I care that you are a decent human being. That’s it. That’s all. Be good to yourself and others.

Sorry again for the long post. Thanks for reading! 💖🇺🇲🤗✌

After I posted it, I couldn’t breathe. I closed my phone and made dinner. When I checked my notifications, I saw that a few others have agreed. I felt better. I understand having strong views and wanting to be heard, but things are so very out of control. People are only dividing themselves, creating hate and destruction on so many levels.

I’m sure I’ll be judged for wanting things to be all unicorns and sparkles, but then everyone already knows that about me LOL.

Thanks for visiting.


What’s In A Name? Anxiety

I posted earlier today about changes I just made to my site. I mentioned my OCD being a factor. I actually wrote more about it, along with other issues, but I decided to separate the posts.

I would post a lot more, but my anxiety takes control and throws me for a loop. Every single time.

One of the issues that I face constantly is really silly. I have a lot of trouble just naming a post. I do it at the very end and it will literally delay things from being published. I really want something that will capture what I am saying, and will grab someone’s attention.

It’s not just the act of naming the post, it’s what transpires from there.

As I try to find the right words, my anxiety takes over. None of the words seem to fit properly. Then, I wonder if anyone even reads the title and what I have to say, or really cares to begin with. I begin to second guess myself altogether. By then, I’ve already read my post repeatedly. I constantly check for errors, better words, rearrange, and delete things. But, I do it again. Except this time, I determine if it’s even worth posting.

Sometimes, all of this just leads to another post in the drafts folder.

When I do finally hit the publish button, my anxiety and panic takes on a whole other level. I think about who will see it and what people will think of me. Will they judge me? I get embarrassed that I said something stupid, didn’t make sense, or made mistakes.

I also think about the fact that I have followers from all different stages of my life. I am not at all who I was before, or before that. But did they even really know me when the knew me? Probably not. I wonder if I’m judged by a characteristic that I had at that time, but I’ve grown since then. Do they know that?

Does their past judgement affect their current views of what I have to say now, as a very different person.

I know all of this is in my head and a lot of it is trivial. I’m my biggest critic and constantly push myself. I want to do more, but then I feel like it doesn’t matter. I distance myself until I find my inspiration to return.

Sometimes it just helps to know that I’m really helping someone.